After withdrawing almost completely from public view following her staggering loss to Donald Trump on November 8th, Hillary, according to Bloomberg, is plotting a return to the limelight with a new book to be published this fall and a nationwide lying…err…speaking tour. If you can no longer make money taking bribes, might as well restart the book signings and public speaking machine…at $250,000-$500,000 a pop.
Who could resist?
“These are the words I live by,” Clinton said in a statement. “These quotes have helped me celebrate the good times, laugh at the absurd times, persevere during the hard times and deepen my appreciation of all life has to offer.”
“I hope by sharing these words and my thoughts about them, the essays will be meaningful for readers,” Clinton added.
Since the official name of the book has yet to be revealed, the Daily Caller offered up an actual poll with readers overwhelmingly in support of “I’m Just Awful.”
Other suggestions from the comment section:
What difference, at this point, does it make??!!
Weaving a basket of deplorable’s”
What not to do while running for president.
Shaky Ground: How to Run for President While Having Strokes
This time my book will sell over 300 copies, trust me!
It Was NOT My Fault
Why I lost
Why I am a looser
Please buy my book, the foundation is getting no bribe money now.
RE-CORK THE CHAMPANGE!
CANCEL THE FIREWORKS!
And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling Deplorables
And while the book is sure to be an inspirational masterpiece, at least to the swooning liberal book critics who will gladly offer up their “unbiased” opinions, we suspect it will be somewhat light on mentions of the many scandals that plagued her campaign.
Of course, this is all likely unwelcome news for the deeply depressed, disaffected, millennial snowflakes who were hoping for a political comeback for the two-time failed presidential candidate, as it almost certainly signals that she will not be running for New York City Mayor’s seat this fall.
That said, for thousands of dollars, America’s snowflake protesters can at least come in from the cold to catch a glimpse of what could have been at any number of LGBTQVS functions across the country where Hillary will be speaking in the not so distant future.
Clinton will also resume her relationship with the Harry Walker Agency, the speakers bureau she worked with after she stepped down in 2013 as secretary of state. Clinton’s lucrative career as a speaker, notably her 5 minute million dollar talks sponsored by Goldman Sachs, were criticized by primary opponent Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont and others as a sign that she was too close to the financial industry.
Clinton does have some speeches arranged, but not through the Walker agency, Clinton spokesman Nick Merrill told the AP. On March 8, she will address an international women’s day event organized by Vital Voices, the initiative Clinton and then-Secretary of State Madeleine Albright founded in 1997. Clinton will speak at the LGBT Community Center in New York on April 20, and, on May 26, she will give the commencement address at her alma mater, Wellesley College. Her student address at the 1969 graduation ceremonies helped make her a national figure.
What is the over/under on how many times “Russian hacking” will be mentioned in the new memoir?