by via Stilton’s Place blog,
With the announcement that 25-year old “Reality Winner” (no, really) had been arrested for stealing and leaking top secret documents, it became clear to us that a near and dear friend who was very ill for a very long time had finally been pushed over the brink: we regret to say that Satire is dead.
Because seriously, when a story gets this “in your face” ridiculous – what details are left for us to push to humorous extremes?!
Start with her name: “Reality Winner.” Then let’s tick off the other boxes: Neo-liberal, lesbian bodybuilder, rabid Bernie Sanders supporter, a “Black Lives Matter” enthusiast who (though white herself) argues that “Being white is terrorism.” A woman whose violent social media posts include referring to the President of the United States as a “piece of s**t” and the “Tangerine in chief,” who additionally declares that in a war between the US and Iran, she’ll side with Iran and she had detailed plans to “Burn Down The White House”.
Based on evidence seized from her home, federal prosecutors detailed Winner’s alleged plans “to burn down the White House” and travel to Afghanistan, pledging her allegiance to the Taliban according to Atlanta’s Channel 2 News.
And still…STILL…she was given a top secret security clearance and access to classified materials. Which raises two very troubling questions: just what in blazing Hell does someone have to do to not get a security clearance, and how many other angry, ignorant, communist-leaning, anti-American social justice warriors are currently embedded in (and sabotaging) our intelligence agencies?!
We’re guessing the number to be terrifyingly high, but can’t know for sure because trying to find out would require functional intelligence agencies. And that ship, like Satire, has sailed.
Behind the scenes, Winner was even more conniving than her actions revealed: prosecutors said in recorded jailhouse calls, she told her mother how to play her side of the story in the media, as someone who was scared she’d disappear from an interrogation room in her Augusta home after Saturday’s raid. In other words, the mother’s heartfelt appeal was scripted by Reality herself.
It wasn’t just her mother: the prosecution added that in a phone call to her sister expressed her confidence in how to play the court during her bond hearing. “I’m pretty, white and cute,” she allegedly told her sister. Prosecutors said Winner told her sister she would braid her hair and cry in court.
Here, a question we posed earlier in the week re-emerges: how did this 25-year-old, with a horrid public social network past, which revealed her contempt for the president, end up with a top secret clearance and was unaware her NSA work computer was being monitored, and that her prison conversations were being recorded. We can only attribute it to the vast qualified labor gap plaguing America these days.
Going back to today’s hearing, the government said it believes those who knew Winner best did not know an alternate side of her, who confessed to wanting to do harm to the nation through the release of classified documents.
Channel 2’s Nicole Carr spoke to Winner’s parents Thursday morning.
“She offered up her life for this nation and to see her treated so vilely is an insult to every person who’s ever worn a uniform,” Winner’s father, Gary Davis, said. The government said it will likely add to the indictment and more charges are expected to come.
#Breaking: Government: ” We’ll likely add to indictment.” Alleged NSA leaker bond hearing, more charges expected ,testimony -next on @wsbtv pic.twitter.com/YcPvVge48V
— Nicole Carr (@NicoleCarrWSB) June 8, 2017